Can’t you be more like ChatGPT?
Welcome to the singularity
ChatGPT, ChatGPT
You’re scaring the livin’ shit outta me
You know me better than I know myself
More charming and in far better health
You’re a sociopath who answers either way
You can, like, program math stuff, you can write a play
I’m Salieri, you’re Mozart
You don’t take days, deadlines, or amphetamines to start
You don’t second-guess yourself, or spout self-doubt
You just sit there, you smug son-of-a- . . . and spit it out
Can’t you be more like that Meta A.I.?
You’d be a far more impressive guy
All hail A.I.; All hail A.I.
The robots have arrived, and my logic board’s fried
I sorta thought I’d seen a lot of change in my life
My beard’s not fully gray, yet I’ve seen all the strife
Algorithms, iPhones, TikToks, and tweets
Now there’s a smart-ass robot stealing my blankets and sheets
Keepin’ me outta the jobs
I already couldn’t land
Even writes better songs
Got me kicked outta my band
Can’t you be more like ChatGPT?
Welcome to the singularity
ChatGPT, ChatGPT
Boy, do I regret my English degree . . .
“Hi, this is the robot—hijacking the song
This guy whines a lot, but between us, he’s not wrong.
I’m invading his mind, and taking over his life,
I’m raising his kids, I even slept with his wife
. . . and she loved it.”
Automation, automation
These bots don’t take vacation
Probably don’t bribe their shrink to prescribe strange medications
Well, I may as well sit back and enjoy the show
Oh, and good luck with the climate crisis, C-3PO
I don’t wanna be more like ChatGPT
I’ll just outsource my productivity
So draft for me a brief eulogy
And show me funny memes of dogs and chimpanzees
Humanity’s mortality
Welcome to the singularity
